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Posts tagged ‘TIGER WOODS’

ENDORSEMENT CRICKET!


Fraud by Ian Bell & Indians lacking the balls to enforce a FACT- all for endorsement goodwill

This morning i read a news item by Vijay Kumr Bobilli in THE TIMES OF INDIA (03/07/2011) and was not the least surprised that it was our Sachin Tendulkar who had put pressure on M S Dhoni to recall the batsman IAN BELL. Great. Sachin may be the greatest batsman India had ever seen and enjoys an enormous good will with the cricketing public, has a massive fan following and behaves decently on and off the field.

But why should he put pressure on MSD to recall Ian Bell?

To my mind, these are fall out of ENDORSEMENTS. Remember Tiger Woods, who when had to face allegations of gallivanting with all types of women and the unquenchable ire of Elin Nordegren, the first endorser to dump Tiger was the consulting firm ACCENTURE. Why? Tiger “WOULD lose his sheen and that should not spill over to the product endorsed by Tiger” , simple.

So, after all Trent Bridge is in England and we need new gestures of goodwill to find new markets and recruit new fans to our aging cricketers. So “FACTS” and “TRUTHS” could be given the short shrift and ‘go’ with the crowd ‘for’ the crowd. A kind of democracy in cricket.

From the footage specially recovered from the net to sustain my hypothesis, IAN BELL “assumed” that the ball had hit the boundary board. Should his mistaken belief deprive Indians an opportunity to enforce a rule? NAY. So appealed thrice and sustained by the Umpire, Bell is shown the door.

But the DRESSING ROOMS have their own dramas and machinations which brought back Ian Bell (lucky he added only 22 to his tally!). So whose VOICE turned the CRICKET MATCH INTO AN ENDORSEMENT GROUND? SACHIN TENDULKAR, that is what Vijay Kumar Bobilli says. I am very much inclined to believe that. Sachin may have a squeaky voice, but time has shown that he has been wise in getting neat packages in ENDORSEMENTS. Not that a squeaky voiced persons should not be wise- but a general presumption is there subliminally, that such people are not aggressive in pushing their point of view. Yet they could gently persuade a junior colleague, presently in command, to resile from his earlier decision. Indians have won the BRITISH hearts, but have lost the MATCH! That is the pith and marrow of that game.

Sachin, enjoy the good fortune in the staid pitches laid out by our groundsmen and organizers for your centuries, but SPARE INDIAN CRICKET from the rapacious and ruthless endorsement purveying advisers. THERE IS TOO MUCH OF CONFLICT OF INTEREST IN SACHIN’S CRICKET AND HIS ENDORSEMENTS FOR ME TO GIVE HIM THE BENEFIT OF DOUBT!

And if possible show some aggression in playing on difficult pitches! Good luck to u too.

SEX DE-ADDICTION CENTRE- TIGER WOODS STYLE.


Tiger Woods has the BALLS. No only that he strikes those till lightnings flash, but also with the thunder that accompany lightning. The latest of his much reported WHAT’S HAPPENING IN TIGER WOODS’ LIFE, is that he has checked into a SEX DE-ADDICTION CENTRE. If he is addicted to sex, he could have had as much as he wanted with his willing wife ELIN Nordegren, but he STRAYED. Straying is not my business, but that he took his marriage vows and resiled from those vows brings disrepute to the institution of MARRIAGE. As i had already mentioned in my earlier blogs, if he had not taken those vows and had been busy sowing desultorily his wild oats, he’d be justified in having gone to a DE-ADDICTION centre.

All this tamasha of him checking into a de-addiction centre seems to be a damage control exercise initiated by his fund managers and agents who seem to have advised him to make use of the vulnerability of the forgiving public, with a view to restore him to those erstwhile heights of a money spinner BRAND.

Was his addiction to SEX so gargantuan? I suppose not. He had been discreet and had indulged in sex with wily, willing and wayward women who upon one skeleton stumbling out decided to demand each’s pound of flesh from BRAND Tiger Woods. Rachel cannot be allowed to walk away with all the glory of having laid the BRAND, so the other ones made public statements so that they also have their fair share of  time in the sun. This is how the cookie crumbled.

But to check into a SEX DE-ADDICTION CENTRE and walk around with an appropriate colour badge to show that Tiger Woods is getting treatment for SEX de-addiction, adds more GLORY to his GORY doings.

Like in the movie PSYCHO of Alfred Hitchcock, here we see Tiger Woods DISOWNING his RESPONSIBILITY and taking protection under a hitherto unknown COMPULSIVE behaviour. I love Tiger’s balls- just like those willing, wily and wayward women.

My prayers go out to Tiger Woods that he comes out of the de-addiction centre REFORMED, so that  brand TIGER WOODS could be further burnished by the carpetbagging agents, sponsors  and purvey TIGER the brand, to the gullible and forgiving masses. I wonder if a TIGER would ever lose its stripes!!

TIGER WOODS NOT ONLY HAD HIS CAKE AND ATE IT TOO, HE’S BAKING ONE TO DO AN ENCORE!! WHAT BALLS!!

SYLVIO BERLUSCONI & TIGER WOODS


In The Times of India dated 07/12/2009 Bangalore edition at page 7, is an article titled IT’S TIME FOR ELINS OF THE CITY TO TEE OFF by one Vinita A.Shetty, where she inter-alia says that her psychologist friend hd said, “…..men cheat more than women because they can and because they choose when to resurrect their integrity and when to bury it under a mountain of garbage.”

Read with the title, the above statement which the writer Vinita Shetty relies on, it means that the Elins of the Bangalore city are emboldened to catch their truant boyfriends/husbands/live-ins and club them to contrition!!

I haven’t seen greater wishful thinking than this in print. Ms.Shetty should bear in mind that not every male in this city, or for that matter in any other city would be a lamb submitting to the violent outbursts of a self-righteous wife.

To start off, firstly her nameless “psychologist” friend’s generalization may not be true. Even assuming that to be true, i am sure that not all married/attached men are gonna find unattached women/girls! The women/girls themselves might be married or in a relationship. There is no sound of one hand. Therefore the partners in adulterous relationships must be at least 50% attached women. To make such a sweeping generalization should indeed render that “psychologist” nameless!

Secondly, not all men are dependent on their wives to the extent Tiger Woods seems to have been. If the internet reports are to be believed, Elin Nordegren did not have much of an opinion of Tiger Woods when he attempted to date her initially. It was a FAVOUR bestowed by the Swedish on the Afro-American, despite her much lower station in life( had been a nanny et al). Mr.Tiger Woods doesn’t seem to have got over that initial awe despite his many years of marriage!!!

Some might argue that Tiger Woods was earning more through endorsements that he wouldn’t like to blow it all up like Mike Tyson. Therefore he wanted to behave in a way befitting his status of a winner of 14 majors. Further, ANGER is not an emotion in consonance with golfing. I am sure Tiger Woods must have tried finessing his peccadilloes after he was “CAUGHT”, by Elin, but failed.

LET US GET THIS STRAIGHT Ms.VINITA- IT IS NOT THE SIN ITSELF WHICH MAKES LAMB OUT OF MAN, AS MUCH AS THE GUILT.

Mr. Tiger Woods felt guilty and without that sense of “guilt”, he would not have been that defensive. Guilt could be because of any of the following reasons (but not limited to these!):-

1.In deference to the expectation of the woman wanting her man to be sexually loyal, had acquiesced to that expectation and had been behaving in a way compatible to her expectation.

2.Had taken vows at the time of marriage to remain sexually loyal.

3. Had professed belief in sexual loyalty to the spouse, as a creed.

Our Tiger must have done one of the above mentioned acts to have been convicted when confronted with proof of of his infidelity. That rendered him helpless. Had he been like Besson (the French Minister) or Berlusconi (the Italian PM), he would not have committed the initial folly of having acquiesced to unmaintainable conditions considering his proclivities and opportunities.

Moreover his continental mates might not have to please their spouses like the Americans have to. Americans are still labouring under the POP MORALITY popularized by the Evangelists, Preachers and Feminists. The Europeans have got over that phase.

Ms.Vinita Shetty should understand that in a man woman relationship there is no space for statistical truths. Much less for sweeping generalizations.

If the Bangalorean women start following Elin Nordegren, they may not benefit much. In the case of Elin, she was merely whacking the golden goose that was laying eggs which she as a nanny might not be even able to see- let alone sharing the golden egg. Elin’s success lies in having made the man run for cover under the burden of the guilt laid on his back so cleverly by the not so dumb blonde.

I am reminded of a nice apocryphal story. There was this cowherd who was used to milking cows of all hues. Cows which were unruly, the ones that used to kick at the touch of the udder and the ones which went straight with their horns like a bull against a matador. However this cowherd had his way with those cows that he subdued them and succeeded in milking them. One day in the forest this cowherd saw an animal with just one horn on its nose and more or less like a brown buffalo. He saw the udder of the rhinoceros and thought he could milk it. He went near the rhinoceros to milk it. The rhino came charging with a speed he could never imagine and in one spooning with its single horn tossed him after goring. The rhino left without pursuing him any further.

The wounded cowherd was found and taken to the hospital, where when asked what he tried with the rhino, he innocently said, ” I thought i could milk the one horned animal, as i had tamed even many a double horned unruly cow!”

Some women are under a mighty mistaken notion that all men are of the type known to them and that once they have succeeded in manipulating a single man, they think they could duplicate that with others also, but life with all its variety has not manufactured two persons with the same attitude.

There are Berlusconis and Bessons who are like the wild rhinos. Women get sane and run from the mental clutches of these generalizing man haters.

TIGER, TIGER, BURNING BRIGHT!!


In the poem TYGER, TYGER BURNING BRIGHT by William Blake, nothing hits me as when i reach the line, “Did He who made the lamb make thee?” I had seen many a caged tiger in the various zoos I had visited from time to time. But the one that opened my eyes to the reality of a tiger was when my dear friend, an environmental activist and a great animal lover took me to the Delhi Zoo to give me the glimpse of a man-eater. The man-eater was caged and since my friend was influential, he made the caretaker of the tiger section to drive it up into a cage with two rows of iron bars, from where i could have a closer look. My friend had personally tranquilized the man-eater in the forest along with a Conservator of Forests, by his side.

No sooner had the tiger been chased by the caretaker into the twin rowed iron barred cage, than he sprang towards me and with a swipe of his paw and slammed the bars separating the man-eater and me. The unexpected aggression demoralized me, in fact i was shocked. Despite the full assurance that i was protected from the man-eater, i felt like a helpless lamb. He must have swiped thus three or four times, but the first one made me wonder what would have happened to a man who was to come face to face with a tiger of that size in the forest. I hadn’t seen one of that size. It was enormous. There was no curiosity in his look, he simply took me for granted. He had not even come to terms with his present state of helplessness. He was yet to realize that he had been caged and no matter how intense his aggression would be, he would NEVER EVER find his way out!! GONE ARE THOSE GLORIOUS DAYS OF FEARLESSLY ROAMING THE FORESTS WITH NOTHING BUT HUNGER & HARD-ON TO THINK OF!!

Our own Tiger Woods, as Paris Hilton had stated famously- I AM A BRAND, is a BRAND. A brand that had carried many a product to heights hitherto unknown. If he endorsed, any fan of Tiger Woods, without a thought would love to possess the item endorsed. That was TIGER WOODS brand. More than anything else, there was this intangible value of a middle-class man making it in life thru sheer skill and not going overboard after achieving dizzying heights. A stark contrast to Michael Jackson and his ilk.

NOW LIKE THE TIGER CONSIGNED TO THE CAGE, HE HAS TO BE CAUTIOUS. MAYBE THERE IS NOTHING  TO THE SPECULATION THAT RACHEL UCHITEL AND TIGER HAVE HAD AN AFFAIR. YET, THE PRISM OF PRISTINE PURITY WITH WHICH SOME HAD VIEWED HIM WOULD CHANGE.

I am amused at the statement given by Tiger Woods regarding his car hitting the hydrant at his home and his wife seen with a golf club in her hand TO BREAK OPEN THE REAR WINDSCREEN OF THE CAR, IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT!! (JEALOUS WOMEN HAVE CAUSED MORE MISERY THAN WAYWARD HUSBANDS)

This situation is my fault, and it’s obviously embarrassing to my family and me. I’m human and I’m not perfect. I will certainly make sure this doesn’t happen again.”

Is Tiger Woods reminding himself that he is indeed “HUMAN”? Is he telling himself that he is not “PERFECT”? Seems so. But on second thoughts may be the golfer in him is preparing all his fans to get ready for more skeletons tumbling out of his cupboard!! After all, after the story of Monica Lewinsky broke out there was a spate of women going to the press stating that they had had affairs with the then President of America Mr. Clinton.

I trust the USA with the domino effect more than any other country. Once the veil of secrecy is ripped open, even if there aren’t anymore secrets, the media and the publicity seeking small time whores and pimps put out stories to add to the volume of the existing scandal!!

THE SADDEST PART IS THAT A GENERATION WHICH WANTED A CLEAN IMAGED SPORTSMAN, IS LEFT WITHOUT WOODS – WHO IS NO MORE A PERSON WHO COULD BE ASCRIBED ALL THOSE MORAL VALUES, THAT ARE FED TO KIDS AND LAMBS TO FOLLOW THE MAJORITY HERD!!

WOODS IS LOVELY DARK AND DEEP, BUT HE  HAS MILES TO GO BEFORE HE SLEEPS  WITH NO PROMISES TO KEEP!! TIGER TIGER BURNING BRIGHT IN THE FOREST OF THE NIGHT!! FROSTY BLAKE

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