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Archive for April, 2013

Had Zimri peace?


The trouble with most of the Christian preachers is that they do not highlight the passages in the Bible which reflect COURAGE, EXECUTION OF ONE’S DUTY, ASTUTENESS and WISDOM; instead they parrot those passages which are aimed at making “SHEEP” out of men and women who listen to those sermons.

The reason, I presume, is that WEALTH over COURAGE has become the priority of the Preachers. When the followers are wealthy, they could use Malachi 3:10 and skim them of the cream and lead those smug lives.

One of the Biblical characters whom I admire most is JEHU, the Commander of the Israel army during the reign of AHAB and AHAB’S son JORAM (JEHORAM). and who subsequently became the King of Israel. Jehu was not merely courageous but astute and wise as well. These are difficult qualities to blend. JESUS says, BE WISE LIKE A SERPENT BUT INNOCENT AS A DOVE. That was a blend recommended by JESUS, seldom one hears these being expatiated in the sermons, as the Preachers know that if their followers become “wise as serpents” but also “innocent as doves” the followers would reach their SALVATION without ENRICHING THE PREACHERS! So such passages are left out, in the belief that the “wise” are anyway  going to become wise and innocent on their own without their “help”.

JEHU fits the bill of having been WISE LIKE A SERPENT but also INNOCENT LIKE A DOVE. How could I say that  when he committed regicide and also “reginacide”?  Read on and I assure you that I have my reasons for such a conclusion:

II Kings 9

30 And when Jehu was come to Jezreel, Jezebel heard of it; and she painted her face, and tired her head, and looked out at a window.

31 And as Jehu entered in at the gate, she said, Had Zimri peace, who slew his master?

32 And he lifted up his face to the window, and said, Who is on my side? who? And there looked out to him two or three eunuchs.

Ahab, the husband of JEZEBEL was dead and his son JORAM (JEHORAM) was ruling Israel in Ahab’s stead. The Queen Mother was JEZEBEL and exerting much influence in the affairs of the state of Israel. I would like to tell those readers who are not familiar with the political structure as it was then that the original Israel of 12 tribes had split during the reign of Rehoboam S/o SOLOMON into Israel consisting of 10 tribes and Judah consisting of the 2 tribes of Judah and Benjamin. So AHAB was in that line of the Kings who ruled Israel minus the 2 tribes of Judah and Benjamin and for brevity called JUDAH the kingdom.

JEHU was one of the commanders of the army of AHAB and later served his son Joram, but JEHU was a believer in the God of Israel, whereas Jezebel was a worshiper of BAAL and this had led to a lot of internecine manoeuvrings within the kingdom. 

To come back to the thread of the story, Jehu kills JORAM and rides to the palace in JEZREEL, then the capital city of ISRAEL. So JEZEBEL sees JEHU riding into the palace and she “painted her face and tired her her” to receive JEHU and when her offer of PEACE was rejected outright, Jezebel asks him a very LOADED QUESTION; “HAD ZIMRI PEACE? THE MURDERER OF HIS MASTER”

With a little help from 1 Kings 16:15-20 we would be able to understand the connotation!

  15In the twenty-seventh year of Asa king of Judah, Zimri reigned seven days at Tirzah. Now the people were camped against Gibbethon, which belonged to the Philistines.

16The people who were camped heard it said, “Zimri has conspired and has also struck down the king.” Therefore all Israel made Omri, the commander of the army, king over Israel that day in the camp.

17Then Omri and all Israel with him went up from Gibbethon and besieged Tirzah.

18When Zimri saw that the city was taken, he went into the citadel of the king’s house and burned the king’s house over him with fire, and died,

19because of his sins which he sinned, doing evil in the sight of the LORD, walking in the way of Jeroboam, and in his sin which he did, making Israel sin.

20Now the rest of the acts of Zimri and his conspiracy which he carried out, are they not written in the Book of the Chronicles of the Kings of Israel?

So here JEZEBEL from the upper floor of the palace addresses JEHU and tells him to recall the fate of ZIMRI and how people would rebel against his regicide and turn against him and kill him. Jezebel had lost her son/step-son JORAM and is still finding time to paint her face and tire her hair- is it because she, as having got used to her regal ways had to present herself ‘beautified’? I guess not. She had lost Ahab and was continuing her life unaffected with her son Joram and now that JORAM was dead her motto must have been THE KING IS DEAD, LONG LIVE THE KING – THE NEW KING JEHU. But inter-se between Jezebel and Jehu she wanted to have CONTROL OVER Jehu, so that her writ would continue to run in the kingdom.

JEHU, tells the eunuchs in the palace to throw her down and JEZEBEL meets her match and end in the hands of JEHU. In effect what JEZEBEL told JEHU was YOU COULD HAVE KILLED THE KING, BUT TILL YOU TAKE OVER THE INSTITUTIONS AND THE PEOPLE OF THE KINGDOM, YOU CANNOT EXERCISE CONTROL AND ADMINISTRATION OVER THE KINGDOM. AND I, JEZEBEL, HAVE CONTROL OVER THE ADMINISTRATION TAKE ME AND ALL IS YOURS AND YOU, JEHU, DO NOT HAVE TO FACE THE FATE OF ZIMRI. IF YOU, JEHU, WANT PEACE, THEN MAKE ME YOUR QUEEN! I AM ALL DOLLED UP AND WAITING…….TAKE ME AND WE CAN RUN THE KINGDOM!

This was nothing but SEDUCTION, not all sexual but POWER flavoured with sexual innuendo.

Why was Jehu wise? Jehu DID NOT ENTER the palace, but stood outside. There could have been TREACHERY inside and JEHU was aware of Abhimelechs and Siseras who had met sordid end by getting too close to the tower or inside the tents where women were staying!

THAT WAS THE SERPENT LIKE WISDOM IN JEHU. Yet at the same time he bided his time till he was anointed so that he could take over the reins of Israel. In the BIBLE, the only person who was assured kingship to heirs till the fourth generation was JEHU, not even DAVID was able to retain all the 12 tribes beyond the third i.e David, Solomon and Rehoboam!

But why was that so? A man who wants to be the king should be away from the wiles of wayward women. JEHU succeeded where even DAVID failed and history shows that. That SEXUAL INNOCENCE coupled with the WISDOM to wait and choose the most opportune time to strike makes JEHU a bigger hero than DAVID, but DAVID is incomparable as he makes up with his humility, ability to obtain the Grace from God, poetic talent and cunning!

 

 
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Mirror, mirror on the wall……?


Prior to the Supreme Court of India clamping down on dark film users on the cars, women, girls and fops used to never pass by the cars without turning their heads on cars which have their window screens up to have a quick peek at how they look. Now most of the cars in most of the cities have clear window screens thereby bringing in a disappointed look in the eyes of those who were used to using the mirrored walls on the cars.

I have also noticed earlier that girls, women and fops used to intently watch the mirrored wind screens and side windows and adjust their hair, sometimes quickly apply a dash of lip-stick or lip gloss and then turn around and continue their walking, little knowing that there were boys and men inside the same car who enjoyed the care shown by these girls, women and fops!

NOW THAT IS ALL OVER!

Yet, i have seen that some of the girls and women who were habituated to such mirrored images of themselves turning suddenly to have a quick look at their images and disappointed that the windscreens are clear see-throughs!

The following verses which appear in THE BIBLE at James 1:23 & 24, clearly says why ‘men’ look into the mirrors

Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.

If men look into the mirror the reason is simple, THEY HAVE FORGOTTEN HOW THEIR FACES LOOKED LIKE; but when girls, women and fops look into the mirrored images, they want to make themselves attractive- which enhances their sense of well-being! That is a more polished way of looking at why girls and women look themselves in those mirrored window screens- but a more MCP view is that women and girls are NARCISSISTIC! I counter that as NARCISSUS was a young boy before he pined away and became a flower! If we get to Freud’s theory then Narcissism gets mired in all kinds of self-abuse theory!

I personally think that the Supreme Court of India has done a great disservice to those who were in the habit of quickly peeking into the mirrored images  on the dark screens of the cars to set their hair or looks. With this alteration in law, may be the security of the country has gone up, but I feel that the aesthetic component has taken a nose dive. Not every girl, woman or a fop has the facility of a vanity mirror……Further, boys have also lost a lot of fun which used to come out of the way of watching girls and women prepare themselves before a hurried rendezvous!

I am sure the dark films are going to make a come back and provide the Snow White’s step- mom-syndrome back on track! MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL, WHO IS THE FAIREST OF THEM ALL?

Had you not ploughed with my heifer….


Most of the persons familiar with the English language would be aware of the Biblical character SAMSON and consequently DELILAH. But not many would be aware of the fact that there was another Philistine woman whom SAMSON had married- her name is not mentioned and probably that is the reason why Delilah has upstaged all the other women SAMSON had cohabited with.

So the Biblical story goes that SAMSON found this lady from Philistia and was enamoured of her and contracted a marriage with her. As was the Philistine custom, feast would be given to the couple by the bride’s family for ten days and during the feast days men folk  related to the bride have to spend time with the groom.

SAMSON put a riddle to those 30 men from the bride’s side, and the riddle goes something like this- OUT OF THE EATER CAME FOOD AND OUT OF THE STRONG CAME SWEETNESS, WHAT IS IT?

The background story was that SAMSON was confronted with a lion and he killed it, many days later, when he passed by he found that bees had built a comb inside the carcass of the killed lion and SAMSON took the honey and ate that. Therefore the answer was LION and HONEY- which means: out of the dead Lion came something to eat and from the strong Lion came sweet honey.

After the initial nine days the 30 men were not able to answer the riddle, so they pestered SAMSON’S newly married wife and SAMSON, being weary of her nagging, gave away the answer. Subsequently those gentle men wangled the  answer out of Samson’s wife.

When the 30 men answered SAMSON’S riddle, Samson says, “HAD YOU NOT PLOUGHED WITH MY HEIFER, YOU WOULDN’T HAVE ANSWERED MY RIDDLE!”

The interesting imagery is about using a HEIFER to plough. Nobody ploughs land with a HEIFER, as a heifer is a young cow which has not calved. Heifers are nurtured with care for their milk and bringing calves. Oxen, bulls and buffaloes are used for ploughing the land but never a cow and much less a heifer. Samson refers to his young wife to a ‘YOUNG UNCALVED COW’ !

In that one answer Samson showed how these men had threatened a callow cow and taken the answer out of her, instead of finding the answer to the riddle through their imagination or finding out the facts of the life of Samson and using deductive logic!

Now-a-days INNOVATION, PATENT, SOCIALISM, AFFORDABILITY OF MEDICINES are enveloping the media reportage! But the question is WHOSE INNOVATION? and WHO WANTS TO ENCASH SUCH INNOVATION?

The answer is that the generic drug manufacturers want most of the patent drugs to become OFF-PATENT so that they could produce bulk drugs and sell it in the market and make huge profits without the sweat of having done any research. In short, everyone wants to plough with others’ HEIFERS!

WE INDIANS, should encourage not only INNOVATION but also protect the products and processes which are the by- products of such INNOVATION.

To state that the PATENT sought is nothing but an incremental change not meriting the term INNOVATION is a tool used by the unimaginative and the dumb. Nobody remembers that before Edison arrived at TUNGSTEN as the filament for the incandescent bulb, he had to try 999 elements and compounds and abandon them . Even if Edison had serendipitously discovered TUNGSTEN as the material ideally suited for bulbs before trying those 999 material, he cannot be denied the fruits of the HOPE he nurtured that ‘there must be some material ideally suited for the filament, which I have not as yet discovered but I WILL PUT IN AN EFFORT TO DISCOVER THAT MATERIAL’. It is that HOPE coupled with EFFORT which is to be rewarded.

Clubbing HOPE, EFFORT & PATIENCE under the head of INNOVATION is nothing but over-simplification of HUMAN ENDEAVOR. Let us not plough with others’ heifers instead let us find our own bulls, oxen and the like, for reaping our rewards!

The SIBERIAN BIRDS!


 

In the Mudumalai sanctuary near Chennai, during the monsoon and the winter months, there used to land hordes and hordes of Siberian cranes and other birds and occupy the branches of the trees, particularly for nesting and nestling!

Upon reaching Mudumalai sanctuary, they set upon the task of finding suitable partners for themselves. Some of the migrant birds settle down with the local birds and talk about the other Siberian birds and how those Siberian birds ill-treated them while in Siberia. And also how the very same birds have changed their attitude in this sanctuary of plenty!

I even overheard a Siberian bird tell another Siberian bird how “Prosperity drives away pettiness.” The context in which the line was uttered was that, in Siberia to get a fresh fish during the winter months was nigh impossible and they had to scavenge on the left-overs of the Polar bears which used to hunt salmons and in their clumsy eating they would spill the entrails of the fish and that used to be the delicacy for those Siberian birds then, but now with the monsoons in high pitch and the nearby lakes and ponds in a swell, fish was there for their taking!

Their stomachs were full and naturally in such surroundings the birds were in progeny-mode: making young ones and showing great responsibility as nest-holders! But the problem with all this was that, the Siberian birds were fighting for prime branches and trunks for building their nests. This led to a a big commotion in the whole area and instead of making babies, hunting for fish and living well, the Siberian birds, herons and pelicans started pecking each other and the whole sanctuary turned itself into a lake of blood spattered forest.

Since the Siberian cranes, herons and pelicans had a great hierarchy, in true democratic style decided to settle the issue through negotiations and hierachification. The bell-weather heron convened a meeting of all the Siberian birds and first gave them a pep talk and told them:

First of all my dear Siberian birds, you should know that our stay is not permanent and each one of you should take it as a sojourn. 

Secondly, if we fight among ourselves, we stop enjoying the good life which is available here and we would consider ourselves foolish in future , when we are back in Siberia. 

Thirdly, I the Super Heron propose that the SENIORITY which existed in Siberia shall be the norm here too, unless the Siberian birds apply to me directly and I pass you for better privileges than your bosses in SIberia! If I pass you for a better position, then you may have the best tree tops, best trunks and branches for building your nests.

The meeting ended in great camaraderie, but some of the clever herons, pelicans and cranes said but the local birds have already built their nests in most of the choice places, but we are more in number than those local birds, so why not devise ways of dislodging them and taking over those prime spots?

A Siberian stork which heard this said, Boss, WHY NOT HAVE A REVIEW OF ALL THE SLOTS INSTEAD OF ONLY THE SIBERIAN BIRDS AS PROPOSED EARLIER IN THE MEETING? THEN WE WILL BE ABLE TO DISLODGE THE LOCAL BIRDS FROM THOSE PRIME SPOTS. THEREAFTER, WE WILL MAKE A RULE SAYING THAT SO FAR AS THE LOCAL BIRDS ARE CONCERNED THE SENIORITY SHALL BE ACCORDING TO THE AGE- WHICH MEANS THE YOUNGER BIRDS CAN NEVER GET GOOD SPOTS FOR NESTING OR NESTLING. WHEREAS, WE CAN HAVE A DIFFERENT RULE FOR US A ND SAY THAT WE ARE THE BIRDS OF MERIT AND MAKE A LIST BASED ON OUR CAPACITY TO DIVE AND FISH OUT THE BIGGEST FISH, FLY LONG HOURS WITHOUT REST ETC. AND MAKE THAT THE REASON FOR MAKING THE SIBERIAN BIRDS MERITORIOUS BIRDS AND THE LOCAL BIRDS THE OLD BIRDS!

This the Siberian birds agreed UNANIMOUSLY! After all they would have better spots to nest and nestle, even though they are ONLY seasonal birds.

The Local birds which were friendly with some of the Siberian birds, were made aware of the plans of the Siberian birds. The local birds were not only helpless, but were busy performing the tasks which have to be carried out in their own HOMES, whereas for the Siberian birds this was more a RESORT than a home. The local birds used to say, “THESE SIBERIAN BIRDS COME AROUND THIS TIME EVERY YEAR AND FISH FROM THESE PONDS AND SHIT AROUND AND MAKE THE WHOLE PLACE DIRTY, WHEREAS WE TAKE CARE NOT TO SHIT IN AND AROUND OUR TREES!”

So this type of resentment was expressed and the Siberian birds had become more and more aggressive and were pushing the local birds from staying in those tree tops and premium spots and went on to occupy those spots by the sheer strength of their numbers and the SEASONAL MIGHT!

One day a native bird heard a old junior Siberian bird addressing a younger senior bird as “Sirrah”– in Shakespearean English that would be a serious affront to the seniority. So the native bird asked the old but junior Siberian bird how he dared call him his senior as “SIRRAH”, he said, Boss: THE SENIORITY AND JUNIORITY IN MUDUMALAI DOESN’T COUNT FOR US, AS WE, THE SIBERIAN BIRDS, GO BY OUR INTER-SE  SENIORITY IN SIBERIA, AS THIS PLACE IS NOTHING BUT OUR RESORT AND SIBERIA IS OUR HOME. And back home he is senior to me! The native bird thought to himself, “THESE SIBERIAN BIRDS COME HERE TO COPULATE, DEFECATE AND PARTURATE!”

One day, there spread a pestilence in the nearby villages and the mortality reached such heights that the villagers started looking for reasons. Not only that the pestilence broke out, it broke out within a week of the Siberian birds’ MIGRATION. The VILLAGERS discovered that the local birds were CLEAN and kept the surroundings TIDY whereas, the SIBERIAN IMMIGRANTS were merely lavishing themselves with the good life and shitting and breeding and doing nothing besides.

The villagers identified all the nests of the Siberian bird and got them removed. The next day, the migrant birds, left Mudumalai sanctuary and migrated en masse to another sanctuary a few hundred kilometers away FOR SEEKING ANOTHER RESORT TO BEAT THE HARSH SIBERIAN WINTER!

The lesson those birds learnt was NEVER EVER SPEND ALL YOUR TIME FISHING AND SHITTING– DO SOME CLEANING ALSO. MERELY BECAUSE YOU ARE IN A RESORT, IT DOESN’T MEAN YOU DON’T HAVE RESPONSIBILITIES AND DUTIES. FURTHER, DON’T GRAB WHAT IS NOT YOURS IN THE FIRST PLACE AND FINALLY, DON’T MAKE RULES IN YOUR OWN FAVOUR ALWAYS, AS GOD HAS HIS OWN WAYS OF DEALING WITH SUCH PERVERSIONS!

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